Dear Mr. Keillor,
I know all about your affection for Twain and Fitzgerald and Perelman. But I am writing a paper about John Milton and how do you feel about him? And about Hemingway and Nabokov, Gertrude Stein and, oh, Dostoevsky? Which is to say, who else do you love besides Fitzgerald?

Yours very truly,
Mary Whittaker

Dear Mary, I toiled through Paradise Lost as an English major in college, and loved Hemingway and Nabokov, Dostoevsky too, and as for Gertrude, there is not much there, I’m afraid. Much less than meets the eye, anyway. What she lacked in talent, she made up for in opacity. Good luck on your paper. I got an A on my Milton paper, but that was many years ago and probably standards are higher now.